No one plans to be child-centered. Since infants are entirely dependent on parental care, their dependency creates for new parents a heightened gratification. What you need is a strategy for avoiding child-centered pitfalls. With a bit of forethought and effort, you can meet all your baby’s needs while still maintaining a life beyond baby.
Here are a few ideas to assist in achieving this balance:
- Life doesn’t stop once you have a baby. It may slow down for a few weeks, but it should not stop entirely. When you become a mother, you do not stop being a daughter, a sister, a friend, or a wife. Those relationships, which were important before the baby, still must be maintained.
- Date your spouse. If you had a weekly date night with your spouse before the baby, get back in the swing of it as soon as possible. A friend or relative is quite capable of meeting your child’s needs. your baby will not suffer separation anxiety from one night without mom. If you never have had a date night, start now!
- Continue those loving gestures you enjoyed before the baby came along. If you both enjoyed a special activity together, find a way to fit it in. If you buy a special something for baby, select a little gift for your mate as well. In all that you do, treasure your spouse.
- Invite some friends over for food and fellowship. Times of hospitality force you to plan your child’s day around
- others as you work together to prepare your home for the guests.
- At the end of each day, spend fifteen minutes sitting with your spouse discussing the day’s events. This special “couch time,” which takes place before children are in bed for the evening, acts as a visual expression of your togetherness. To help keep this time free of interruptions explain to your children: “This is Mommy and Daddy’s special time together. Daddy will play with you afterward, but Mommy comes first.” Children are assured of mom and dad’s love relationship through this tangible demonstration. Besides, couch time genuinely assists couples in sharing their needs and concerns with each other.